BONUS MARCH PROJECT!
BONUS MARCH PROJECT THAT LASTED UNTIL JUNE IS NOW OVER!
**update – i have done the PEEPS®-math and four more recipes should rid me of (most of) my leftover PEEPS® and THEN i can close this project out &yadda.
*update – i am going to continue this slightly into april, because greg’s still upstate with my chocolate mousse PEEPS® and i didn’t have time to make the lemon bar ones, but i bought all the ingredients, so. two more recipes! soon!
since i finished Animal Querkles too quickly, i have some extry days of march to fill with projects, and i’m choosing to fill them with this book! i don’t think i could handle a month’s worth of PEEPS® recipes, gastrointestinally speaking, but a week? i can manage that. sugar high, here i come!
PEEPS® Peek-a-Boo S’mores Fudge
first things first, you’re gonna need to decapitate some bunnies
bowl of adorable carnage
then you do some stuff with ingredients to make the fudge (since this is just a mini filler-project, i’m gonna skimp on details, if that’s cool), and tuck the heads in like they’re PEEP-ing out of their chocolatey graves
then you solidify them in the fridge, add some graham
and decorate your morbid easter tableau most festively
will these bunnies rise again after three days? who knows – by then they will long be eaten. i will let you know if i experience any indigestion.
PEEPS® Double Chocolate Cookie Sandwiches
first, you make these cookies. and these cookies are amazing. like, truly amazing. i will make these again, with or without PEEPS®. (probably without, TBH)
and then you arrange the bunnies like so
and then you microwave
the book warns: Microwave, one by one, for 8-12 seconds until the Bunnies begin to puff up, depending on your microwave wattage. Do not microwave for any longer than that or your cookie will fall apart and be too fragile to pick up.
i don’t know what gives with my microwave, but my Bunnies just weren’t puffing up, so, yeah – i had to microwave for much longer.
and this happened
but these things happen. at least i can enjoy the cookies by themselves. and i WILL, because – delicious. i am going to make some ice cream sandwiches with them and see if those turn out any better.*
oh, and i tried to provide the microwave footage requested by Rossdavidh, but unfortunately, my microwave likes to keep its secrets.
PEEPS® Crème Brûlée
okay! time for a recipe from the “PEEPS® gourmet” chapter! because we fancy!
but first, an emotional photo montage of the noble PEEPS® who sacrificed themselves for this dish. CYO saccharine heartstring-tugging ballad to accompany:
but it was worth it, right? for crème brûlée?
and yes, those little top-holes are from me poking them to see if they were done
these took twice as long to cook as recipe claimed. these photos make them look all dried out as a result, but i assure you, they were creamysweet and the perfect custardy texture
oh, but something’s missing!
for this part of the recipe, i bought a couple of GIANT bunny PEEPS®
and borrowed greg’s blowtorch
which is pretty much my favorite thing.
and then WHOOOOSH with the flame
although maybe giant bunnies are too giant for this.
don’t care – this was unexpectedly delicious, and while it doesn’t top the crème brûlée recipe i got from some guy that used to work at gotham, if you have PEEPS® and heavy cream on hand, why wouldn’t you make this?
PEEPS® S’mores Brownies
this was a messy, messy one!
it started out fine and easy – make a graham cracker crust, make some brownies from a mix (cuz no one’s judging), toss some PEEPS® and chocolate chips on the top and find some easter-themed toys (optional)
and then bake and broil and torch those PEEPS® like crazy
and you get a brick of this
and it IS a brick; able to be held aloft, panless, without falling apart
but a pretty, stratified brick
that kind of resembles unicorn vomit
but then you gotta cut these puppies
and that’s where it gets messy
and you end up with goopy, sticky, marshmallowy treats
that are delicious, but GOLLY that’s one messy confectionary…
No-Bake Lemon PEEPS® Cake
this recipe is lying to you. i’ve made more than a few baked goods in my time, and while i was making this one, i thought, “that’s not nearly enough butter to make a crust.” and, “there’s no way they’re using lemon pudding in that photograph.” and, “how is theirs so… tidy?” and, “go to hell, ‘love from the oven!’ if that’s even your real name! why do you want me to fail? and why are you contributing a recipe to this book that doesn’t even require an oven???”
joke’s on them, though, because i can food-style, too.
YOU CAN TAKE YOUR FILTERS AND SHOVE THEM, ‘LOVE FROM THE OVEN!’
on a less yelly note, i do like how you can see the PEEPS® peep-ing out from just under the whipped cream here.
and i just realized that i actually made this one on april 1st, so let’s call it a very elaborate prank on me. well played, ‘love from the oven.’
i am returning to this project after a little palate-cleansing break! i will do a couple more recipes before closing this down for the season, with the option to revisit it as seasonal PEEPS manifest.
The PEEPS® Crispy Rice Treat
i wasn’t planning on making this one, but i ended up with far more PEEPS® in my house than was sensible AND i had taken a chance and bought a box of Kellogg’s Strawberry Krispies™ that i needed to find a use for, since they are unacceptable as a breakfast cereal. SO! crispy rice treats it is!
it was madness—an orgy of bunnies and chicks of all different colors cavorting in a hot tub of butter with no sense of decency
once more into the fray, boys!
this is what regret looks like. those eyes, so haunted…
and so here’s the thing—recipe encourages baker to: Make your crispy rice treats match the occasion by using different-colored marshmallow PEEPS®—pink PEEPS® will result in pink treats and so on.
i do not think this is true. the sugar is the colorful part of a PEEP, and when the sugar dissolves, it takes its color with it into the ether somewhere, and what’s left is just… beige; only slightly differently-colored from a traditional marshmallow.
which is why it’s a good thing i was using Kellogg’s Strawberry Krispies™ so it didn’t look like some PTA bake sale up in here.
using PEEPS® to make krispy treats is weird—it makes these mallow-spiderwebs form, and it’s not as adhesive as using proper marshmallows.
i can’t tell if this is pretty in pink or a bad case of eczema
either way, they’re not as gooey and satisfying as regular RKTs, but they’re an easy way to foist off unwanted cereal on others.
before i make another recipe, an interlude. just before easter, when i was still hip-deep in this project, i decided i didn’t have ENOUGH PEEPS® in my life and i needed to go to dylan’s candy bar for their ‘chillin’ with my peeps’ milkshake, which is a unicorn-ejaculate craft project thought up by dentists to drum up more business.
do you see all these baubles?
they are affixed to the cup with FROSTING
but it did match my nails, which was nice.
okay, interlude over.
PEEPS® Reindeer Chocolate Mousse Cups
pay attention, aspiring french chefs, because apparently, this:
is all you need to make chocolate mousse.
don’t believe me? good, because this is an example of a recipe that is BROKEN, and a reason i am glad i am doing this project; so i can WARN you when things like this happen. recipe calls for chocolate chips, butter, chocolate mousse reindeer PEEPS®, whipped topping (optional) and chocolate sprinkles (optional). i had some whipping cream in my fridge already, so i OPTED to use it to make whipped topping. but had i not OPTED to make whipped cream, i would have followed the recipe: putting the three ingredients in the microwave, stirring, allowing it to cool, observing that it was indeed ‘very thick’, just as the recipe told me it would be, and then calling it a freaking day. because the next step is to combine the whipped topping and the chocolate mixture, with no indication that the whipped topping was previously designated an optional ingredient. lemme tell you – it ain’t optional. if you do not use the whipped topping, you will have a ‘very thick’ paste of melted chocolate and butter with some chemically-marshmallowy texture. so but BECAUSE i was led to believe it was optional, i didn’t buy any additional whipping cream. i used the 1/2 pint i had on hand, even though it called for 8-ounces of optional whipped cream. i figured it would be a little thick but still yummy and-hey-it’s all OPTIONAL, right? anyway, long story short, i made this:
i do not think it is mousse, but it is tasty. PSA reminder to always read your recipes critically before you dive in, because sometimes they let pranksters write these things.
PEEPS®-Stuffed Chocolate Chip Cookies
this recipe called for PEEPS® Chocolate Mousse Chicks Dipped in Milk Chocolate, but i had to use the PEEPS® Filled Delights: Chocolate Caramel Swirl Dipped in Milk Chocolate. i do not think the recipe suffered for the substitution.
first, you cut your chicks in half and build your cookies around them:
they make little smiley balls
THEN YOU BAKE AND ENJOY!
i prefer my own chocolate chip cookie recipe, but i love this idea of secret PEEPS®, so i might do it again, karenstyle.
PEEPS® Lavender Panna Cotta with Blackberry Sauce
who’s this fancy lady making treats outta marshmallow rabbits, putting smug-looking marshmallow chickies on top? IS ME! this tastes powerfully of flowers, like eating an old lady’s church-hanky. if you are a rabbit or a person who likes eating flowers, like may’s issue of food network was telling me people are now, you will like this. i like the sauce very much. i’m still acquiring the taste for flora, but i’m going to have another one and see where it takes me.
PEEPS® S’mores Milkshake
IT WAS A GOOD MILKSHAKE. i’m running out of space, so i’m just dropping this one in quicklike before the final two to wrap this project up.
PEEPS® Mini Baked Donuts
i do not have mini donut pans, so mine are more cake-blobs than donuts AND YES i DO realize i could have cut the center out and faked a donut, but i’m learning to live with my decision not to. to make up for my lack of mini donut pans, i used the tiny bunny-shaped silicon molds that erica easter-basketed me one year to make PEEPS® donuts that are PEEPS®-shaped and the crowd goes wild.
also, this recipe called for 2 tbsp ‘baking power.’ shoot, i am MADE of baking power.
PEEPS® Birthday Cinnamon Rolls
i call bullshit on this one. the roll-part of the recipe is fine.
but for the frosting – for the part that actually has the PEEPS® in it, it says to melt the PEEPS® with butter until combined, remove from heat, allow to cool. LET’S SEE HOW THAT GOES!
this recipe calls for Party Cake PEEPS®.
there’s safety in numbers, fellas!
oh noooooooooo! this party’s OVER!
and this is what you get.
this is the substance that is now meant to be mixed into the cream cheese&etc mixture to make one big happy frosting. but it will not mix into that mixture. the electric beater just goes CLONK CLONK CLONK and you end up with a yummy buttery cream cheese frosting with giant rando chunks of calcified PEEPS®-snot in it.
so while you do get tasty cinnamon buns at the end of all your labor
those Party PEEPS® died for nothing and don’t even factor into the final product.
a sad end to a fun, if very drawn-out, project.
UNTIL NEXT PEEPS® SEASON!!!
* spoiler alert – they DID: