Images You Should Not Masturbate To by Graham Johnson
My rating: 5/5 cats
when MFSO recommended this book to me, all those months ago, i thought,”finally! a book i don’t have to exhaust myself masturbating to. a book whose images i can just enjoy platonically, without feeling compelled to feverishly pleasure myself with every turn of the page.” and yes, part of me wanted to rebel, to be all “don’t tell me what i can’t do” about it, and to masturbate to each and every one of those pictures, triumphantly, even if it depleted me forever! but now that the book is out, i find the advice to be sound. one should not masturbate to a picture of a dog in a wig; this is good advice. one should perhaps not masturbate to a photo of a hole in a tree. now, i am not telling you people what to do in your own private lives; i am very much in the camp of “i don’t care what turns you on as long as i don’t have to watch you do it.” hell, i am the mascot for that camp:
(do not masturbate to me, please)
but i think that if you have to masturbate, there are plenty of images even right here on the olde internet that could help you meet your goals. (a quick “google” of the words “free porn” tells me that there are still images of adult humans in various stages of undress for your delectation). let this book remain unsullied by your lewd thoughts and actions.
except maybe this picture. this one is just asking for it, really:
thank you, mfso!!
