Dot-to-Dot: Cats: Connect Your Way to Calm by Karine Nayé
My rating: 5/5 cats
WELCOME TO JANUARY PROJECT!!
JANUARY PROJECT IS OVER!!
and to the first project of 2018. will this book truly bring me peace and calming moods? that last connect-the-dots project sure didn’t. but maybe cats will make all the difference?
JANUARY 1 640 dots
do i feel calmer? not yet. “sleepy” is different from “calm,” right? i feel sleepy. but i do think this is going to be a better book than Dot-To-Dot Famous Faces: Test Your Brain and de-Stress with Puzzle Solving and Coloring, so at least the 2018 project cycle is off to a better start.
JANUARY 2 633 dots
do i feel calmer? not significantly, no. in fact, this book might actually stress me out. the whole time i’m connecting these dots, i’m thinking “shouldn’t you be using what little free time you have to go to the bank? and do the dishes? isn’t this a wildly frivolous exercise considering how many things in your life are bad and need tending to?”
DECEMBER 3 628 dots
what a naughty little kitten! question—do the editors of connect-the-dot books realize that we can pretty much already tell what the picture is going to be because of, you know, the dots? is this just a pervasive trade delusion where they pretend it’s a mysterious image only revealed as the final line is made? or is it just me? do i have MAGICAL EYES?? discuss.
DECEMBER 4 673 dots
okay, first of all, i love how grouchy this cat looks, even though it’s just dots—i appreciate how clearly the expression comes through. but…what’s with all the pre-made lines? does the book not trust me to connect the dots on my own? is the pillow too complicated a shape for an amateur artist to master? does the book expect me to fail? this is simply destroying my self-confidence. what gives, book?
JANUARY 5 644 dots
is she on a sled? a giant envelope? a cardboard box? the dots will NEVER reveal their secrets!
JANUARY 6 610 dots
wookit those BEANS! do not wookit the wobbles on the right-hand perimeter. sometimes it’s about the journey, not the destination. my lines like to see the sights between the dots.
JANUARY 7 585 dots
we’re so wonderfully wonderfully wonderfully
wonderfully pretty!
oh you know that i’d do anything for you
we should have each other to tea huh?
we should have each other with cream
then curl up by the fire
and sleep for awhile
it’s the grooviest thing
it’s the perfect dream
JANUARY 8 516 dots
for most animals, this would be a cry for help. for a cat, it’s just another cozy day…
JANUARY 9 575 dots
okay, you win, book: this time, i wasn’t sure what the finished product would be before i connected the dots. i knew where the cat would be, but i wasn’t sure what all the surrounding matter was. however, i stand by my earlier statement because, having connected the dots, i’m still not sure what the surrounding matter is. is it grass, bamboo? it is even vegetation or is it some bombed-out white picket fence? is she in JAIL? is this social commentary or nature documentary? is that spiky thing beneath her paws a dead bird or is that just wishful thinking?
JANUARY 10 TWO sets of dots: 201 and 409
this is a new one for me. this one has two different connect-the-dots paths, in different color ink, and you’re meant to complete them in contrasting colors, adding a whole new depth to the finished work. like so. i suppose it’s effective, but necessary? game-changing? discuss.
JANUARY 11 630 dots
this is wonderful—the eyes of the demoncat on the left, the languid aggression of the one on the right. this is what cats are, and now i love this book the most.
JANUARY 12 692 dots
before i connected the dots, i looked at the layout and said to myself (okay, out loud, because i talk to myself, and it’s perfectly normal), “oh, man—i bet that cat’s up to some shit!” and now that i have connected the dots…i’m not really sure what’s happening. how many cats is this even? 2 or 3? what are those prefab petal-shapes? are they flower petals? water droplets? exertion-sweat? because cats don’t sweat. nor do they explode, generally, although that might be what is happening here. unless they are being thrown off a bridge into a body of water. i can’t tell if expression is pain or ULTIMATE COZY. where do cats begin and end? in any case, this is the last time i use my own lap as my connecting-the-dots surface. this business requires some firmness, and i am too squooshy to ever be a good table.
JANUARY 13 545 dots
again, i’m unsure what this picture is. is it a GIANT CAT that lives under an overpass? dreaming of a littler cat? why is that little cat so worried? other than the fact that it might only exist in the dream of a giant cat. is this an alternate ending to Lost?
JANUARY 14 619 dots
i’m not sure if this one is messy and jaggedy by design or if i somehow messed up the math on this dot-to-dot. in any event—there’s a cat.
JANUARY 15 622 dots
forgive this photo—i didn’t realize it was so wonky until i went to post it and it was obviously too late to take another virgin shot.
i thought this was going to be a picture of a kindly old owl carrying a bunch of kitties off on an adventure. alas, it is just some cats in a jockstrap. much less magical.
JANUARY 16 670 dots
i think this one is a dream sequence.
JANUARY 17 476/257 dots
another one that uses TWO different colors. but in a weirder way, where plants and horizons go all halfsie because who is even regulating these connect-the-dots? it’s sheer anarchy! and now i’m gonna get caught up in the sting operation and be the one protesting that i was only following orders. this is how they get you. thanks, trump.
JANUARY 18 555 dots
this cat is machinating. in some irish ghost estate. machinating like a mofo. and then going out for a curry.
JANUARY 19 612 dots
why wait for a double-color page to whip out the four-color pen, i ask you? any day can be a pink-ink day. because i am a girl.
JANUARY 20 575 dots
bad kitty, true, but also bad humans—who doesn’t have a safety grate in front of their fireplace? what if someone stumbles? or a bird flies in the window and pushes the cat into the flames? you know it’s always on their little birdy minds…
JANUARY 21 353/244 dots
did i connect the dots wrong, or is that a goldang dog? and look what this illicit snuggling has caused—blue head and pink body? what does this all mean?? why make me do this in two different colors if you’re not going to respect the physical boundaries of these creatures? what say you, book?
JANUARY 22 577 dots
i think this is the aftermath of the january 20 picture. let this be a lesson to you.
JANUARY 23 563 dots
another visual narrative i’m struggling to parse. is this a post-apocalyptic scenario? the jagged ruins of a city where this fattyfat cat is king? or is this just a regular stray who knows where the food’s at? or is this an art gallery and is that a mondrian? either way, this cat’s doing just fine. and he hates you.
JANUARY 24 599 dots
this one’s a real question mark. i understand the perspective, mostly, but View Spoiler »
JANUARY 25 605 dots
oh no! that cat is falling down an airshaft! who will even rescue her?
JANUARY 26 426/210 dots
i will never understand these two-tone pages. who is determining this color distribution? who is lord of the dots? is it a cat? because it really should be someone who can see in color.
JANUARY 27 537 dots
i have zero reaction to this one. it’s cute, but it’s just white noise. i can’t explain it. it doesn’t look like anything to me. oh shit, wait…
JANUARY 28 696 dots
look at how many lines were already made for me. this is basically the connect-the-dots equivalent of mansplaining. MAYBE YOU WOULD JUST LIKE TO DO THE WHOLE PAGE YOURSELF, BOOK! which i get, because this is one of the cutest ones, but still. on your own time, book!
JANUARY 29 575 dots
ack! a cat that is turning into a BIRD! quick; reverse the procedure!
JANUARY 30 642 dots
no complaints here—this is just flat-out adorable. coos of appreciation.
JANUARY 31 579 dots
what a way to close out the book!! demon eyes, splayed beans, showing off the goods, except…where are its front paws?? we may never know.
thanks for playing along all month! dot dot MEOW!
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