Drowning Instinct by Ilsa J. Bick
My rating: 4/5 cats
this is a karen-four, and maybe not-four-everyone four.
it is dense and intense. it is like 5 YA books in one. it is like HELLO I AM A BOOK AND I AM ABOUT A GIRL WHO NEARLY DIED IN A FIRE AS A YOUNG CHILD AND IS COVERED WITH HORRIFIC BURNS AND HOW THESE COMPLICATE HER LIFE. OH AND SHE IS ALSO A CUTTER. OH AND ALSO, HER FAMILY IS COMPLETELY MESSED UP WITH THE ALCOHOLISM AND THE SCREWING AROUND AND THE INABILITY TO COMMUNICATE AND WHATNOT. OH, AND SHE WAS INSTITUTIONALIZED. OH, AND ALSO ALSO SHE COMES FROM A FAMILY HISTORY OF MADNESS AND SUICIDE. OH, AND ALSO INCEST. AND MURRRRRDERRRRR. OH, AND LET’S THROW IN AN INAPPROPRIATE RELATIONSHIP WITH HER TEACHER.AND SOMETHING ELSE THAT ORDINARILY WOULD HAVE BEEN ITS OWN BOOK BUT IN THIS BOOK IS JUST ONE.MORE.THING.
i mean, most people would just write a couple of books out of that. not ilsa j. bick! she just goes for it, full throttle.
and for the most part, it works.
i read this book straight through, all page-turning and groaning and needing to know what else could possibly happen. a lot did, my friends. a lot.
the structure of this book, which is a sort of audio confession into a policeman’s recorder thingie on the evening of an incident, makes the story incredibly fast-paced, but of course only gives us one side of the story. a damaged side. but what a great voice this character has! and i kind of want to blame any inconsistencies of other-character-behavior on her – on her being an unreliable narrator, but it might just be wide-eyed trust and me liking the book enough to overlook how parents can go from not letting this girl shower with the door closed and inspecting her for new cuts every single day to just booking out of town for a week without a thought about possible hazards. for example. there are a couple of “whaaaa??” moments like that, and i will just say “that’s what happens when you have an unreliable narrator, son.” and hope that that’s true.
but – yeah. these are very nuanced characters who don’t always behave the way you think they would/should. and that’s pretty great in YA books – i love to see that. and even though sometimes you feel like, “AND that?? AND this??,” the snowballing is more fun than unrealistic. fun is definitely not the correct word here. but you know what i mean – gripping?? satisfying? awesome?
dunno – i kind of don’t want to say too much about this. but i do recommend it. so.
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