50 Ways to Lose Your Glasses by Warby Parker
My rating: 4/5 cats
i will probably never lose my glasses, because i have this little guy with a big nose
who holds onto them for me when they are not on my face.
but there are many ways to lose your glasses, (at least 50!), and some of them are unavoidable because there are always gonna be sharks trying to ruin your day.
so, having read this entire book, i have selected a few threats to PSA out at you – the ones i feel are the most likely to affect you in your day-to-day glasses-wearing life. i haven’t personally experienced any of these yet, but it’s only a matter of time, and if i were more courageous about jamming foreign objects into my eyes, i might be more amenable to going the contact lens route. for now i will just make sure to avoid goats. which is good advice even if you don’t wear glasses.
here are a few more threats you should be aware of, if you are a glasses-wearing nerd like me. educate yourself.
sleepwalking
time travel
accident
garbage disposal
poker
centrifugal force
ghost
mega sneeze
seismic activity
spontaneous combustion
elves
promotion
swamp monster
now that we have that covered, feel free to offer suggestions for avoiding these situations and i shall compile them in a pamphlet and distribute it on the subway. we gotta stick together.
