Crafting for Cat Ladies: 35 Purr-fect Feline Projects by Kat Roberts
My rating: 4/5 cats
may project has been put on hold, obviously, because my beloved maggie—the star of this review—is no longer with us. i may return to it at a later date, because i was in the middle of making three things, and there were more i was very interested in making and had already bought all the supplies for and everything, but it’s not something i can muster enthusiasm for at this moment. i will add the pictures when i finish them, but there will be no scornful cat-reactions, which is a joy-sapping acknowledgement. thank you to everyone who left me kind words on this thread—i have been too scattered and sad to respond to them, but i sincerely appreciate it, and maggie would have, too, in her own way.
the last picture i ever got to take of maggie was of her with this book:
it’s not the best picture of her ever taken, but it’s still my girl. and honestly, i have taken enough pictures of her to pretend that she’s alive for years to come, but that’s probably not healthy.
so—pour out some liquid to maggie, and hug your own fuzzy ones hard.
and someone step up the pet cloning research, because i got some whiskers here and i want my girl back.
WELCOME TO MAY PROJECT!!!
i make no promises about doing one-a-day, but i’m going to do MANY of these throughout the month, and it’s going to be spectacular! join me, crazy cat ladies!!
CAT MAGNETS
CATS! MAGNETS! GLUE GUN!
this is one of the simplest crafts ever and i simplified it even further by opting out of half of the instructions because i thought that spray-painting these cats would make them très uggo, and fumes/mess were not something i wanted to be dealing with. maggie is not into huffing.
so—this is what we have:
maggie is unimpressed with crafting skillz:
“you glued magnets onto toys? gimmie some opposable thumbs and i’ll show you all the things i could do better than you were evolution less capricious.”
that’s really hurtful, maggie.
i have started three other projects, but they all involve drying time & etc, but SOON!
CAT ARMIES
CARDBOARD! FELT! GLUE! SOCKS! NEEDLE/THREAD! FABRIC/REGULAR SCISSORS!
this is another variation on the given instructions. they are meant to be thigh-high socks, but this body doesn’t do thigh-high socks, but it does do armies. so i did armies.
pretend these are two different arms—i am no octopus-photographer.
fortunately, i was able to wrangle some outside help for the maggie portion of this photo shoot. flanked by two cat bodyguards, maggie cannot understand how she is still being picked up and snuggled. “what do i pay you bozos for??” she roars.
JEWELRY TRAY
CLAY! ROLLING PIN! PAINTS! MOD PODGE! EXACTO THINGIE! PENCIL! PAINTBRUSH! PARCHMENT PAPER!
the clay took forever to air-dry, and then it had to dry again after i painted it, even though i was painting it gray over already-gray clay, which was dumb, but now it is wicked gray. like fifty shades of gray. i was going to add a layer of silver glitter-paint, but i think it looks okay like this. no need to liberace it up. you can’t really see its dimensions here, but it is indeed a tray, with raised sides so nothing falls out.
but what does maggie think?
she does not think much of it. i overheard her muttering something about how cruel it is to put a dish on the floor if there is no food in that dish and something about how she suffers and i think she played the cancer card somewhere in there.
but this is not for cat food. this is for cat jewelry
CAT RING
FELT! BUTTONS! EMBROIDERY THREAD! REGULAR THREAD! NEEDLES APPROPRIATE TO THOSE THREADS! AWL! SCISSORS FOR PAPER AND FABRIC BOTH! RULER! PAPER! MARKER!
i’ve been taking some liberties with the instructions for this project, which is something i rarely do because i’m such an obedient crafter. but i don’t yike rhinestones (also, i couldn’t find any with holes in them) so i used BUTTONS. so brash! so bold! and i never did use that awl i dug out of the tool box, but it was probably more necessary for the vinyl/leather variant of this project. but felt feels better on my fingie, so felt it is!
and felt feels nice to maggie, when i give her soft ear rubs:
PURR-TY PAINTED ROCKS (sez book, not me)
ROCKS! PAINTS! PAINTBRUSH! SHARPIE! MOD PODGE!
instructions are simple: paint some rocks. i was wicked excited to find these at the dollar store. of course, i was on my way to go on a cupcake tour, and maybe it wasn’t the smartest thing to carry all across the city, but fortunately, greg’s back is not as busted as mine, so he carried them like a hero.
i positioned them around maggie as she slumbered
giving her a horribly disorienting case of morning-after panic.
oh, maggie, you dirty bird, you!
CAT EARRINGS
GLUE! EARRINGS! PAINT/PAINTBRUSHES! PAPER! SCISSORS! PENCIL! RULER! PRETTY PAPER! SPARKLY CIRCLES!
i am a jewelry-maker!
and a jewelry model!
but i’m not the only one
oh, man—this is the most indulgent maggie has ever been with me.
she is thinking SO MANY mean things right now, but i gave her plenty of gratitude treats. cat models are the exact opposite of human models and suffer the camera only if they will be rewarded with food. and she was rewarded oodles.
CAT’S MEOW COASTERS
FUSE BEADS! IRON! PARCHMENT PAPER! ADHESIVE FELT (not shown because i couldn’t find it until today)
this was my first experience with fuse beads, but i think i did an okay job—the blue one i made from the template in the back of the book, the red one i made on my own (which is why there is an extra row, causing symmetry-fail)
the best thing about these is that you can use them to turn a grumpy cat into a cat who is happy to see you! self-delusion is always welcome in my house.
PAW PRINT STAMP
SPOOL! SHARPIE! SCISSORS! CRAFT FOAM! INDEX CARD! GLUE! INK PAD! MAGGIE LURKING IN BACKGROUND!
i decided to make a little cat-face instead of a paw print, because a paw print could be from anything, and a cat head can be only from a cat. plus, this is the way i sign all my letters anyway, so now, what a time saver!
SIGNED! SIGNED! SIGNED! SIGNED! SIGNED! SIGNED! SIGNED! SIGNED! SIGNED!
i could not get maggie to pose with this one. she went so far as to put her paw over her face to avoid involvement.
KITTY-CAT WREATH
WIRED TWINE! FOLIAGE GARLAND! SCISSORS! GLUE GUN! MANY FAKE FLOWERS! FLORIST’S WIRE!
first you make a little cat head out of wired twine
and you sneak a maggie shot
and then you make nature happen
then you do this and feel bad about it, but also that it is totally worth it
CAT WALLET
SPARKLY VINYL! TRANSFER TAPE! EMBROIDERY THREAD AND NEEDLE! SCISSORS! PENCIL! EXACTO KNIFE!
i messed mine up pretty badly—you can’t really tell here, but trust a karen. the directions in the book aren’t always as clear as they need to be for my dumb brain, and i thought i had lined all the parts up the way the pictures showed, but i had to do a lot of adjusting to get it to be a wallet. also, transfer tape is impossible to find, i finally located it at the a.i. friedman’s as it was being looted in its going-out-of-business sale and was pretty much the only thing left—miles of transfer tape. snif. bye-bye, a.i. friedman’s. also, i don’t know if i used the right kind of vinyl. whatever, i made it, it’s sparkly, and i already have an excellent wallet. maggie can use this to poop in. if she ever poops again. #mycatisconstipated
poor maggie. it’s been a rough week. much hiding under the bed in discomfort.
SU-PURR-IOR STATIONERY (again, not my name)
ROUND PAPER! GLUE STICK! ORIGAMI PAPER! RULER! SCISSORS! PENCIL!
i made so many! and maggie used one to send me a letter!
oh, no! i will add much more to this—i have a few projects half-finished, but it’s been not-so-crafty around here with worry and cancer-hating.
read my book reviews on goodreads
