I Shot a Man in Reno: A History of Death by Murder, Suicide, Fire, Flood, Drugs, Disease and General Misadventure, as Related in Popular Song by Graeme Thomson
My rating: 3/5 cats
i don’t read a lot of rock crit or even listen to a lot of music anymore, but i really did enjoy this book which is like a crash course in the history of the murder ballad, and the teenage death song (i have to track down that one about the shark attack!!) and the body count in gangsta rap etc. sometimes i think he lets his prose get away with him: “Black Angel’s Death Song is what an Elizabethan madrigal would sound like after being mugged by highwaymen, dragged on horseback to a subterranean dungeon, and then beaten about the flesh by the bones of dead pirates for three hundred years.” you have gone too far, rock critic! but almost all of the chapter about the seductive power of the death-song to the goth and emo teen was well-put, and a little uncomfortable, ifyaknowwhatimean…i should read more of this stuff—it is a great contextualization.
so these are just my favorite death-songs that i can think of while sitting here, many of which were not included in the book. lyrics are in the spoiler-click, song title links’ll take you to youtube.
Way Away – Toad the Wet Sprocket. i can’t think of a better song about the hypocrisy of a funeral, and just how awkward it makes everyone involved. except the corpse.
View Spoiler »Line of people to pass you by
Posing sympathy with its whitewash eyes
With the ladies feigning their mourning cries
And the men shaking hands:
Weigh away
Way away
All the pictures in your mind
As you’re passed the thousandth time
Thousandth photograph
Listen to sympathetic lies
As their reasons change under mourning guise
With the gentlemen feigning sorrowed sighs
And drinking champagne:
Weigh away
Way away
As all the people pass and pose
You hold back the tears
And hold onto memories
Small talk hangs like a dirty cloud
Saying nothing real but deafening loud
An urge to run away from the crowd
And mourn all alone:
Make a promise to no-one
Wondering if you’d been worthwhile
Turn away from the chatter
And the hungry smiles « Hide Spoiler
Millie and Billie – Alice Cooper. my favorite murder song. my dad sat me down when i was way little and played this song for me on those oversized headphones from distant times…life-changing. and i don’t know how you write a book about death and murder in music and never once mention alice cooper, who made it very fashionable indeed.
View Spoiler »Billie I wonder why are we insane
Will we ever get better
Will we stay the same
Billie I’m worried
Millie don’t worry
No one knows our pain
Being in love is crazy not alone that way
I know you’re worried today
God made love crazy so he wouldn’t feel alone
He was thinking of us he was thinking of us
God made love crazy so he wouldn’t feel so alone
Billie my mind seems to wander
To events of a night long ago
Driving alone with our guilt well concealed
In the trunk of your ’68 Olds
Millie our world’s an asylum
And our minds like you say ain’t that straight
But you know and I know our passion’s
Not deformed it’s true to say
We’ll love our lifetime
God made love crazy so he wouldn’t feel alone
He was thinking of us he was thinking of us
God made love crazy so he wouldn’t feel so alone
Billie I dream of our children
They’re frightening and gruesome and sad
And I don’t want them growing inside me
They’re no price for the love that we have
Oh Millie oh Billie criminally insane
Oh Millie oh Billie
Oh Billie it’s fresh in my memory
The night that it had to be done
You with your pick axe and scissors
And you with your shovel and gun
And I liked your late husband Donald
But such torture his memory brings
All sliced up and sealed tight in baggies
Guess love makes you do funny things
Oh Millie oh Billie criminally insane
Oh Millie oh Billie « Hide Spoiler
No One Lives Forever – Oingo Boingo. a happy carnival of a death-song. they have never shied away from the theatrical elements of rock and roll, and they have always had a massive day of the dead influence shoring them up. chill out, death isn’t a big deal—have a little dance before you go…
View Spoiler »You worry too much / You make yourself sad
You can’t change fate / But don’t feel so bad
Enjoy it while you can / It’s just like the weather
So quit complaining brother
No one lives forever!!
Let’s have a party there’s a full moon in the sky
It’s the hour of the wolf and I don’t want to die
I’m so happy dancing while the grim reaper
Cuts, cuts, cuts
But he can’t get me (I’m as)
Clever as can be, and I’m very quick, but don’t forget
No one lives forever!!!
You think you got it rough / What about your darling doggy?
Ten short years / And he’s getting old and groggy
I don’t think it’s very fair
Cold, chop, low, but it’s all relative my friend ’cause
No one lives forever!!!
Let’s have a party there’s a full moon in the sky
It’s the hour of the wolf and I
Don’t want to die (but) . . .
No one beats him at his game
For very long but just the same
Who cares, there’s no place safe to hide
Nowhere to run–no time to cry
So celebrate while you still can
‘Cause any second it may end.
And when it’s all been said and done .
Better that you had some fun
Instead of hiding in a shell-Why make your life a living hell?
So have a toast, and down the cup
And drink to bones that turn to dust (’cause) . . .
No one, no one, no one, no one . . . . . . . (etc.)
No one lives forever!! (Hey!) « Hide Spoiler
Keep Me In Your Heart – Warren Zevon. the other side of the coin is the saddest song ever written by someone so close to death; there was a very real chance he wasn’t going to live long enough to finish this album. but he did. and it is powerful stuff. he wrote a lot of songs about death during his life, but the ones written when he was sick are themselves killers.
View Spoiler »Shadows are falling and I’m running out of breath
Keep me in your heart for awhile
If I leave you it doesn’t mean I love you any less
Keep me in your heart for awhile
When you get up in the morning and you see that crazy sun
Keep me in your heart for awhile
There’s a train leaving nightly called when all is said and done
Keep me in your heart for awhile
Sha-la-la-la-la-la-la-li-li-lo
Keep me in your heart for awhile
Sha-la-la-la-la-la-la-li-li-lo
Keep me in your heart for awhile
Sometimes when you’re doing simple things
around the house
Maybe you’ll think of me and smile
You know I’m tied to you like the buttons on
your blouse
Keep me in your heart for awhile
Hold me in your thoughts, take me to your dreams
Touch me as I fall into view
When the winter comes keep the fires lit
And I will be right next to you
Engine driver’s headed north to Pleasant Stream
Keep me in your heart for awhile
These wheels keep turning but they’re running out
of steam
Keep me in your heart for awhile
Sha-la-la-la-la-la-la-li-li-lo
Keep me in your heart for awhile
Sha-la-la-la-la-la-la-li-li-lo
Keep me in your heart for awhile
Keep me in your heart for awhile « Hide Spoiler
Diamond Smiles – The Boomtown Rats. thomson mentions I Don’t Like Mondays, of course, but i have always liked this song better. a poor little rich girl suicide with great musical moves.
View Spoiler »“Traffic’s wild tonight”
Diamond smiles her cocktail smile.
Tonight she’s in heavy disguise.
She looks at her wrist to clock the passing time.
“Weather’s mild tonight”
She wonders will they notice her eyes,
She wonders will her glamour survive,
And can they see she’s going down a third time.
Everybody tries,
It’s Dale Carnegie gone wild,
But Barbara Cartland’s child
long ago perfected the motionless glide.
In the low voltage noise,
Diamond seems so sure and so poised
She shimmers for the bright young boys,
And says “Love is for others, but me it destroys”
The girl in the cake
Jumped out too soon by mistake,
Somebody said the whole things half baked
And Diamond lifts her glass and says “cheers”
She stands to the side
There’s no more to this than meets the eye,
Everybody drinks Martini dry,
And talks about clothes and the latest styles.
They said she did it
With grace.
They said she did it
With style.
They said she did it all
Before she died
Oh No
I remember Diamond’s smile
Nobody saw her go,
They said they should have noticed
‘cos her dress was cut so low.
Well it only goes to show
Ha, ha, how many real men any of us know.
She went up the stairs,
Stood up on the vanity chair,
Tied her lamé belt around the chandelier,
And went out kicking at the perfumed air.
They said she did it
With grace.
They said she did it
With style.
They said she did it all
Before she died
Oh No
I remember Diamond’s smile « Hide Spoiler
Old and Wise – The Alan Parsons Project. this song always got to me when i was little. it is wonderful melodrama, and perfect for those “look at me, i’m sad” teenage years when you assume you will never be old and are already wise.
View Spoiler »As far as my eyes can see
There are Shadows approaching me
And to those I left behind
I wanted you to Know
You’ve always shared my deepest thoughts
You follow where I go
And oh when I’m old and wise
Bitter words mean little to me
Autumn Winds will blow right through me
And someday in the mist of time
When they asked me if I knew you
I’d smile and say you were a friend of mine
And the sadness would be Lifted from my eyes
Oh when I’m old and wise
As far as my Eyes can see
There are shadows surrounding me
And to those I leave behind
I want you all to know
You’ve always Shared my darkest hours
I’ll miss you when I go
And oh, when I’m old and wise
Heavy words that tossed and blew me
Like Autumn winds that will blow right through me
And someday in the mist of time
When they ask you if you knew me
Remember that You were a friend of mine
As the final curtain falls before my eyes
Oh when I’m Old and wise
As far as my eyes can see « Hide Spoiler
Tomorrow, Wendy – Concrete Blonde. her voice has always lacerated me, emotionally. i honestly have no idea what this song is about, but i have put it on nearly a thousand mix tapes growing up. yes, tapes.
View Spoiler »It is complete now, two ends of time are neatly tied A one-way street, she’s walking to the end of the line And there she meets, the faces she keeps in her heart and mind They say “Good bye tomorrow Wendy you’re going to die” Tomorrow Wendy, you’re going to die
Underneath the chilly gray November sky We can make believe that Kennedy is still alive and We’re shooting for the moon and smiling Jackie’s driving by and They say “Good try tomorrow Wendy, is going to die” Tomorrow Wendy is going to die
I told the priest, don’t count on any second coming God got his ass kicked the first time he came down here slumming He had the balls to come, the gall to die and then forgive us No, I don’t wonder why, I wonder what He thought it would get us? Hey, hey, good bye, tomorrow Wendy is going to die
Hey, hey, good bye Tomorrow Wendy is going to cry Tomorrow Wendy is going to cry
Only God says jump, so I set the time ‘Cause if He ever saw it, it was through these eyes of mine And if He ever suffered it was me who did His crying yeah Hey hey, good bye, tomorrow Wendy is going to cry (Tomorrow Wendy is going to die) Tomorrow Wendy is going to die (Tomorrow Wendy is going to cry) Tomorrow Wendy is going to cry
Hey, hey, good bye, tomorrow Wendy is going to cry Hey, hey, good bye, tomorrow Wendy is going to cry (Tomorrow Wendy is going to cry) Tomorrow Wendy is going to cry « Hide Spoiler
God Loves a Drunk – Richard Thompson. this one gets a mention in the book, but it is such a good song, that i will have to re-mention it here. it ain’t pretty.
View Spoiler »Will there be any bartenders up there in Heaven?
Will the pubs never close, will the glass never drain
No more D.T.’s and no shakes
And no horrors
Very next morning you feel right as rain
O God loves a drunk, the lowest of men
With the dogs in the street and the pigs in the pen
But a drunk’s only trying to get free of his body
And soar like an eagle high up there in heaven
His shouts and his curses are just hymns and praises
To kick-start his mind now and then
O God loves a drunk, come raise up your glasses, amen
Does God really care for your life in the suburbs
A dull little life of dull little things
and bring up the babies to be just like Daddy
And maybe you’ll be there when He gives out wings
But God loves a drunk, although he’s a fool
He wets in his pants and he falls off his stool
He can’t hear the insults and whispers go by him
As he leans in the doorway and sings Sally Racket
Can’t feel the cold rain beat down on his body
And soak through his clothes to the skin
O God loves a drunk, come raise up your glasses, amen
Will there be any pen-pushers up there in Heaven?
Does clerking and wage-slaving win you God’s love
I pity you worms with your semis and pensions
If you think that’ll get you to the kingdom above
But God loves a drunk, although he’s a clown
You can’t help but laugh as he gags and falls down
He don’t give a cuss for what people think of him
He screams at his demons alone in the darkness
He’s staying alive for just one more pint bottle
Won’t you throw him few pennies, friend
God loves a drunk, for ever and ever, amen « Hide Spoiler
Who by Fire – Leonard Cohen. both Dress Rehearsal Rag and Chelsea Hotel #2 get a mention, but this song is so much spookier and still wryly-funny, that i gotta put it here.
View Spoiler »And who by fire?
Who by water?
Who in the sunshine?
Who in the night time?
Who by high ordeal?
Who by common trial?
Who in your merry merry month of May?
Who by very slow decay?
And who shall I say is calling?
(Who shall I say is calling?)
And who in her lonely slip?
Who by barbiturate?
Who in these realms of love?
Who by something blunt?
Who by avalanche?
Who by powder?
Who for his greed?
Who for his hunger?
And who shall I say is calling?
(Who shall I say is calling?)
And who by brave assent?
Who by accident?
Who in solitude?
Who in this mirror?
Who by his lady’s command?
Who by his own hand?
Who in mortal chains?
Who in power?
And who shall I say is calling?
(Who shall I say is calling?) « Hide Spoiler
Song of Joy – Nick Cave. i don’t know if there is a nick cave song that isn’t about death. but this one wins for me because of its sly lyrical confession built in, its subtlety. hats off to him for this one.
View Spoiler »Have mercy on me, sir
Allow me to impose on you
I have no place to stay
And my bones are cold right through
I will tell you a story
Of a man and his family
And I swear that it is true
Ten years ago I met a girl named Joy
She was a sweet and happy thing
Her eyes were bright blue jewels
And we were married in the spring
I had no idea what happiness a little love could bring
Or what life had in store
But all things move toward their end
On that you can be sure
La la la la la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la la la
Then one morning I awoke to find her weeping
And for many days to follow
She grew so sad and lonely
Became Joy in only name
Within her breast there launched an unnamed sorrow
And a dark and grim force set sail
Farewell happy fields
Where joy forever dwells
Hail horrors hail
Was it an act of contrition or some awful premonition
As if she saw into the heart of her final blood-soaked night
Those lunatic eyes, that hungry kitchen knife
Ah, I see, sir, that I have you attention!
Well, could it be?
How often I’ve asked that question
Well, then in quick succession
We had babies, one, two, three
We called them Hilda, Hattie and Holly
They were their mother’s children
Their eyes were bright blue jewels
And they were quiet as a mouse
There was no laughter in the house
No, not from Hilda, Hattie or Holly
“No wonder,” people said, “poor mother Joy’s so melancholy”
Well, one night there came a visitor to our little home
I was visiting a sick friend
I was a doctor then
Joy and the girls were on their own
La la la la la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la la la
Joy had been bound with electrical tape
In her mouth a gag
She’d been stabbed repeatedly
And stuffed into a sleeping bag
In their very cots my girls were robbed of their lives
Method of murder much the same as my wife’s
Method of murder much the same as my wife’s
It was midnight when I arrived home
Said to the police on the telephone
Someone’s taken four innocent lives
They never caught the man
He’s still on the loose
It seems he has done many many more
Quotes John Milton on the walls in the victim’s blood
The police are investigating at tremendous cost
In my house he wrote, “Red right hand”
That, I’m told, is from Paradise Lost
The wind round here gets wicked cold
But my story is nearly told
I fear the morning will bring quite a frost
So I’ve left my home
I drift from land to land
I am upon your step and you are a family man
Outside the vultures wheel
The wolves howl, the serpents hiss
And to extend this small favour, friend
Would be the sum of earthly bliss
Do you reckon me a friend?
The sun to me is dark
And silent as the moon
Do you, sir, have a room?
Are you beckoning me in?
La la la la la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la la la « Hide Spoiler
Hell’s Ditch – The Pogues. i just love this song. end of story. the contrast of the jolly music with the filthy, horrible imagery. glorious.
View Spoiler »Life’s a bitch, then you die
Black Hell
Hell’s ditch – naked howling freedom
The killer’s hands are bound with chains
At six o’clock it starts to rain
He’ll never see the dawn again
Our lady of the flowers
Genet’s feeling Ramon’s dick
The guy in the bunk above gets sick
In the cell next door the lunatic
Starts screaming for his mother
Black dildo, black hell,
As the Spanish cops ridiculed my gel
A mugshot I remember well
Little man how you have suffered
I could hear the screams from up above
If it ain’t a fist it isn’t love
As for our lady she kneels down
Her neck is bent, the blade comes down
Doing! There goes the breakfast bell
Back from heaven, back to hell
Naked howling freedom – Hell’s Ditch « Hide Spoiler
there a hundreds more, and i invite you to share your own, whether they have been covered in the book or not, it is always nice to talk about this kind of music, and teach me new songs.
and i do want that oingo boingo one played at my funeral. by danny elfman himself, please.
read my book reviews on goodreads
