if you know me and the breadth of my reading tastes, you may well ask yourself “is this children’s book or monsterporn?”
but lemme clear it up for you—this is a children’s book, so get outta here, sickos!
it is only a very tiny little book, but it does have some knowledge to drop, about how you should be glad that your mommy is not a shark:
The pup of the great white shark is almost the size of a man. As soon as they are born the pups go their own way. It is not safe to stay near a hungry mother.
and why sharks should not eat puffer fish
and how dolphins are the bullies of the ocean and it’s about time we stop thinking of them as pals worthy of airbrushing onto things because they are horrible beasts
it almost reads like poetry
because the lines
are broken up
and these days
that’s all you need to do
to call yourself
that page is extra fun because it looks like this little shark is barfing that whale into existence
which is not how whales are made, but it SHOULD be.
there’s not much to this book, but i gotta squeeze in as many shark books as i can during SHARK WEEK RARRRR, so there you have it. a shark book of fewer than fifty pages that still somehow manages to have a few pages that should have been edited away. for example, this:
Scientists want to study sharks. But it is hard to study them at sea. And it is hard to keep big sharks alive in a tank. Once scientists caught a great white shark. They put it in a tank with other fish. But the shark did not eat. And it kept bumping into the sides of the tank. After a few days the shark began to die. So the scientists took the shark back to sea. They set it free.
that’s like a greg story right there, man—leaves you speechless but for all the wrong reasons.
they live underwater and are picked on by dolphins.
life is unfair.